Yes We Camp!

So I'm throwing a little shindig for the 4th of July, you know, because I love big, sweaty Americans. So if you happen to be a big, sweaty American, come on down and bring your cute, fashionably emaciated girlfriend with you. Free cowboy hats for the first so many attendees!

Oh and the event is at a special secret location. Partially because I like to keep things underground, and partially because the place where we're throwing it wants us to keep our numbers low- to around 80 or so. So hit me up to find out the when and wheres!

Tandem Gesucht!

A tandem, for those who find the term as foreign as I did when I first heard it, is basically a language swap. I've been trying to do one for quite some time but every time I find someone who seems to fit the bill, they either move or are too busy or plans just fall through. Anyways, I finally got around to putting up yet another ad on Kijiji (the German equivalent of Craigslist) seeking a tandem this Summer. In the ad, I mentioned that I was 24 and had interests in reading, writing, electronic music, cocktail parties, and so on and that I was looking for someone around the same age with the same interests so that "die sprechen kommt leicht." I already received three responses, all of which are strange and which I intend to share with you because I am a rude person:

Tandem response #1:
Even if you are looking for someone younger, I offer you my help in anyway. I am 60 years, am retired, was teacher of German and Juristerei. Gladly I am willing to teach you to grant a temporary classroom. I do it voluntarily. Common interests, we have both too. This is read, write, close, compose, play and sing. Do you like it so superior. Hope you do a nice young teacher or Studemten find. Regards Günther

Tandem response #2
i am also interested in tandem conversations.i would be nice to have some conversations in english and some in german.i am native german a i think we could help each other.im a 24 year old male sportsmen,love to party at black music,house and eletronic.i live in tempelhof airport.to kreuzberg it takes 10 minutes by car.
i am lokking foreward to see you!

Tandem response #3
Cool,
Then we can advance my englich and your german ;-)
Liebe Grüße

I responded to #3. Not that I don't like hanging out with 60 year old lawyers named Gunther or young German sportsmen who are into black music, but I feel less intimidated by simplicity.

Billy Boy Condom Energy Drink

It was recently brought to my attention that Billy Boy, the condom company with the lovable penis und frucht motif, has been making an energy drink. Check it out:

One has to wonder what kind of crazy person would want to try an energy drink created by a condom company. But apparently the drink is doing pretty well here in Germany. They've even made a Billy Boy Cocktail. AND you can even get a free condom in every can. Makes a great gift basket item.
They also sell lighters with Billy Boy doing all kinds of active things like parachuting or dressing up for carnival in his best penis-sized wig. Oh Billy. You're the wackiest anthropomorphic penis ever!
And if you're looking for some "really cool perspectives" try downloading some of the free desktop wallpapers located on the Billy Boy website. This will definitely send the right message to the ladies in the office.
The condoms themselves include fruit flavored, transparent, beaded, or with "special power." This last one kinda scares me. I don't want my boyfriend's prophylactics to have special abilities I'm not aware of.